Is it gross?

I was at lunch talking about cars. It went something like this:

Al: So I was thinking about just getting a new car, fully loaded with all of the options I want.

Nancy: What’s wrong with your current car?

Al: Nothing’s “wrong” with it, but there’s some little things that I don’t love. For example, I don’t like the grill.

Nancy: When you drive your car, do you notice your grill?

Al: No, but girls do.

Tom: If you want to impress girls, why don’t you buy a house?

WHAT? How does buying a house impress girls? Does I need to buy a *nice* house, or is it just the idea of home ownership that’s impressive. If it’s home ownership, is it the idea that I have money invested in assets? And how do I impress girls with that? I can drive around with an awesome car and be noticed by girls, but I can’t very well bring my house to bars. Should I bring the deed? Or alternatively, if it’s the idea of being well invested, can I just bring my investment portfolio and show her my above-average average annualized returns (which I do have!)

This was Theresa’s response later in the day:

It shows girls that you’re ready to settle down.

WHAT? So should I buy a house in the suburbs and buy a minivan too? And plus, I don’t want to lie to women and make them think that I am ready to settle down, and I don’t think I want to attract girls that are looking for guys that are willing to settle down. I want to find women that can get excited about an awesome car! And I imagine that there are better ways of showing girls that you’re ready to settle down than buying a house before you get married!

So what’s my conclusion for the day? WOMEN HAVE NO IDEA WHAT ATTRACTS WOMEN.

(Okay, neither do I, but I’m just saying…)

(And also, I’ll admit, that was a pretty loosely formed conclusion, but I’m just saying…)